By Dr. Cynde Gardner, DVM, BCH
Why does a celebration of life have to occur after death?
I read an article this morning that really gave me pause.
In Quebec, Canada, a lovely veterinarian committed suicide recently. The article talked about the long, hard, stressful hours she spent taking care of the local horses. The demands on her because of the shortage of veterinarians in her area. How she gave so much of herself so that the animals could be cared for, and the owners didn’t have to worry that their pets wouldn’t receive the care they needed.
She gave and gave until there was no more of her left to give.
Something that really struck me was how many people stepped up after her passing to say what an impact she had on them, their animals, and the community. They praised her for her dedication, hard work, caring and compassion. They spoke about how wonderful she was.
They were left in shock. Surprised that she, of all people, would feel so lost that she would take her own life. They said how much she would be missed.
The article was a beautiful tribute to a caring, compassionate person.
But the tribute came after she was gone. How many of those people who said they would miss her told her she was appreciated while she was alive and giving her all for them and their animals?
How many told her she was valued and an important part of their lives?
Far more demanded care for their pets on their own terms without consideration for her and her personal life, because it was her “job?”
How many complained about the bill after the care was given, without consideration of what it cost her in schooling, continuing education, personal expertise, time, energy, supplies, overhead costs, etc. that she provided for them without complaint?
How many asked her if there was any way they could make things easier for her? To support her as she continually gave everything she had?
Why wasn’t she celebrated during her life instead of waiting until she was gone? What if she had been told how much she meant to her clients during her life? Would she still be alive to serve them?
Veterinarians are perfectly imperfect human beings with feelings, families, foibles, emotions, and lives of their own. Yet, they are treated like machines who must be perfect in every way, always. And they are expected to provide their services at no or low-cost, or they are accused of not caring for animals and being money-grabbers.
Veterinarians and their support staff deserve to make a reasonable living.
Veterinarians are all-too-frequently attacked for every imperfection, real or imagined. Often, when the public or client doesn’t understand the full the situation involving their pet, they assume the veterinarian must have been wrong.
When the client doesn’t follow the directions given by their veterinarian and the pet fails to improve, somehow it becomes the veterinarian’s fault.
When you look at the whole picture of the veterinarian’s life, it really isn’t surprising that the suicide rate in veterinarians is significantly higher than that of the general public. The suicide rate in veterinarians is, in fact, one of the highest of any profession.
Bullying of veterinarians is all too common. People are quick to share what they perceive as imperfections, yet very reluctant to take a moment to share the good they have experienced from their veterinarian or support staff.
It will take a concerted effort from the public to reverse this trend. We are losing too many veterinarians to suicide or to them simply leaving the field they are passionate about and have spent their lives training for.
Take a moment to thank your veterinarian and their staff for providing their expertise and caring for your precious pets. Let them know they are appreciated. If you don’t understand something about your pet’s treatment, talk with them about it rather than attacking their integrity.
Let’s all step up to reverse the trend of veterinarian and staff attrition by showing them the respect you would like to receive for your own work. Appreciate what they give and that they truly are giving their best to you.
We will all benefit from this by having veterinary care more readily available, happier veterinarians and staff to serve you, less exhaustion, and better overall care for your pets.
Dr. Cynde Gardner is a retired veterinarian who now practices hypnotherapy and life coaching. She is on a mission to transform the lives of veterinarians and other professionals, helping them move their life From Frazzled to Dazzled™.
She focuses on nurturing positive change and helping professionals decrease stress while increasing career and life satisfaction.
International best-selling author of the number one and Pinecone Award-winning book When Good Enough Is Perfect – A Veterinarian’s Guide to Change, Acceptance, and Letting Go, Dr. Gardner has been a featured expert on CBS and NBC.
She is a sought-after speaker, having spoken at the American Veterinary Medical Association and American Holistic Veterinary Medical Association conferences, hypnosis conferences, leadership groups, and at the Business Expert Forum at the Harvard Faculty Club.
